Dining Guide

From reading a place setting to handling awkward moments — a quick table-manners reference for every situation.

Table Setting

Reading a Place Setting — A full-course setting is a map of the meal, laid out in the order the courses arrive. Here’s what each piece is and where to find it.
Working From the Outside In — Cutlery is laid out in course order, from the outside in. Take the outermost pair with each course and you’ll never be unsure, however many courses there are.
Holding Your Knife and Fork — Fork in the left hand, knife in the right, index fingers along the backs. You’ll cut with less effort and your movements stay small and neat.
Where the Glasses Go — Glasses sit at the upper right, above the knives. The water glass directly above the knife anchors the group, and the wine glasses follow to its right in order of use.
Holding a Glass — Hold a stemmed glass by its stem. Your hand won’t warm the wine, and the bowl stays free of fingerprints.
Using Your Napkin — Fold your napkin in half on your lap and use it freely. Where you leave it tells the staff whether you’re coming back.

Taking Your Seat — Enter from the left of your chair and sit as the staff eases it in. Once seated, leave one or two fists’ width between you and the table.
Posture at the Table — Sit up straight and bring the food to your mouth. While you’re eating, keep your elbows off the table.
Bags and Phones — A small bag goes behind your back or at your feet; large bags and coats go to the cloakroom. Put your phone away and keep the table clear.
Seats of Honor — In a private room, the seat farthest from the door is often the seat of honor. As a guest, don’t choose for yourself — wait for the host.

The Flow of a Course Meal — A course meal moves from appetizer to dessert in a set order. Knowing what comes next keeps you relaxed and free to focus on the people around you.
Cutlery Signals — How you place your knife and fork tells the server whether you’re still eating or finished.
Eating Bread — Don’t bite into your bread. Tear off one bite at a time and enjoy it alongside the meal.
Eating Soup — Bring soup to your mouth quietly with the spoon. Never lift the bowl to drink from it.
Fish Courses — Eat a whole fish without flipping it: top fillet, remove the backbone, then the bottom fillet. Gather bones and skin at the far side of the plate.
Meat Courses — Cut meat one bite at a time from the left end and eat it while it’s warm. Use your knife and fork for bone-in meat, too.
Dessert and Coffee — Use the spoon and fork set above your plate for dessert, and stir your coffee quietly. Then settle in and enjoy the conversation.
Wine and Toasts — Leave your glass on the table while wine is poured. For a toast, raise it to eye level and meet people’s eyes.

Dropped or Missing Cutlery — If a utensil falls on the floor, leave it and ask the server for a new one. Do the same if something is missing.
Bones and Things You Can’t Eat — If you find a small bone or pit in your mouth, cover your mouth with one hand, remove it with your fork or fingertips and set it on the edge of the plate.
Leaving the Table — If you need to step away, wait for a lull in the conversation, excuse yourself briefly and leave your napkin on your chair.
Declining a Drink — A brief word before it’s poured, or a fingertip resting on the rim of your glass, is all it takes. No explanation is needed.
If You Spill Something — Stay calm, blot with your napkin and quietly ask the staff for help. The less fuss, the better.

Choosing Topics — Choose topics everyone at the table can share, and gently steer away from sensitive ones. Draw quieter guests in, too.
Eating and Talking — The trick is not to eat and talk at the same time. Take small bites, and swallow before you speak.
Phones at the Table — Put your phone away during the meal and give your time to the people in front of you.
The Bill and Saying Thanks — When you’re a guest, leave the bill to the host and thank them in specific words. How a meal ends is how it’s remembered.